What the stars have shown me

I ordered a neonatal astrology report, inputting my birthday, time of birth to the minute, and place of birth. I wanted to get an ancient perspective on my past, and frankly, I'm open to new tools in whatever form they may take.

I was blown away.

I mean I've read the daily horoscopes, and frankly, their accuracy is terrible.

But wow, when you have one created just for you? I can honestly say that the report was about 85% accurate.

It served it's purpose... I found exactly written down what I have been struggling from.

And that's the key, isn't it? Without a correct perspective of the past, how does one chart a new future?

If found it very interesting that within the report was a summary that stated I would relearn how to live at a point in my life, but I had to break free first.

Amazing. Here I am.

I've become aware through meditation of something interesting. I'm rather at an impasse regarding it.

Through expanding my awareness of my thoughts, I've become aware for a little while now of this flowing river of thoughts that, until recently, has passed by my consciousness unnoticed and unchecked.

Negative energy, self-defeatist, unworthiness. These thoughts were flowing past my rational mind, and straight into manifesting exactly what they are intended to: heartbreak, job loss, financial loss, uncertainty, fear, and defeat.

No wonder I hit rock bottom.

Now that I have the knowledge of what was the cause, exactly how do I fix it? I was in technical repair for all of my working life.

I know I have to comprehend and utilize the tools available to me. But it's hard to grasp that which is metaphysical, much less find an exact tool or process that you trust to have results.

I suppose awareness is the beginning of fulfillment, it's just that the journey is new.

I'm like a baby waking up in a new world that was always there, but I couldn't see it before.